Grief has no calendar.
No matter how much the world might suggest otherwise, there is no set point where loss should hurt less, feel lighter, or be neatly resolved. There is no deadline for tears, memories, or longing.
And yet, many people find themselves quietly asking: “Shouldn’t I be further along by now?”
Where the Pressure Comes From
Often, the pressure isn’t spoken out loud. It shows up in small ways:
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Fewer check‑ins as time passes
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Comments like “You’re so strong” or “They’d want you to be happy”
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A sense that your grief is becoming inconvenient
Slowly, you may start to wonder if something is wrong with you. There isn’t.
Grief Is Not a Straight Line
Grief moves in waves, not steps. You can feel okay one day and undone the next. You can laugh and still ache deeply. You can function well and still feel lost inside. This doesn’t mean you’re going backwards. It means you’re human.
Healing doesn’t look like constant improvement — it looks like learning how to live alongside loss.
You Are Not Behind
There is no version of grief you are failing at. Your pace is your pace. Your relationship with your loss is unique. Your way of remembering, coping, and surviving matters. You don’t need to justify how long it’s been. You don’t need to measure your healing against anyone else’s.
A Gentle Reframe
Instead of asking: “Why am I still grieving?”
What if you asked: “What do I need right now?”
Grief isn’t something to complete. It’s something to tend to — with patience, kindness, and care.
Closing Thought
You are not late. You are not broken. You are not doing this wrong. Grief doesn’t follow a timeline. And neither does healing.
You matter.
Sharon Makin - Makin' You Matter ❤️
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